No llores por mi, Argentina. Mi alma está contigo.

Do you hear that noise? The sound of panicking? You probably don't, as it is almost entirely drowned out by the deafening roar of denial.



I remember the exact feeling in my stomach, when the plane left the ground and I thought to myself: "Welp. Here goes nothing." I had no idea what to expect; no idea what I'd see, what I'd do, the people I'd meet, the things I'd experience, or how I'd feel on the other side. 

Here I am on the other side and... I'm just not quite sure how nearly five months have slipped by me so fast. I can say with assurance that choosing to spend an entire semester five-thousand miles from home is one of the best decisions I've ever made. I love this country. I love this city. I love this culture and these people. 

I know I'm not the same person I was when I got on that plane at DFW on March 1, but I couldn't tell you how. I am beyond excited to come back to Texas for a lot of reasons, but as Nelson Mandela said, "There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways that you yourself have changed." I can't wait to find out just that.

How long was I here? Long enough for this foreign world to no longer seem foreign. I feel at home. I can name every subway stop in order and tell you which sides the doors open on. I know the waiters of my favorite restaurants and the owners of the quiscos on my street by name. I know just about every Starbucks in the city. I no longer squint in confusion at Argentine slang (cien mangos? por qué tantos mangos?). I can give driving directions to the other side of town, and can practically smell the closest place with free wifi. I finally have this crazy city down, and now it's time to say goodbye. 

Things I Will Miss:

• Spanish. Spanish from everyone, everywhere, all the time. I have always thought Spanish to be a gorgeous language, and love the way it feels on your tongue. Argentine Spanish, however, es otra cosa. I will greatly miss being constantly surrounded by the “¿Todo bien? Todo tranqui?” and “¿Qué sé yo?” and “Pero qué te pasa, boludo?” and “Che, ‘cuchame” and “Claaaaro, claro… ahh mira vos!”
• Sweaters. Dogs in cable-knitting, grandpas in sweater vests, cute boys in cardigans...
• Argentines. I can't explain it, I can't put my finger on it, but there's something so incredibly argentine about the Argentines and I absolutely adore it. 
• Dulce de leche, milka chocolate, kinder chocolate, gelato.
• Cheap steak. Cheap wine. Cheap taxis. (An “expensive” taxi ride is anything over $6 here.)
• Convenience of city life. Everything is within two blocks. 
• Toddys. Like Chips Ahoy, if Chips Ahoys were sprinkled with dreams, dipped in miracles, and then soaked in love.
• People watching on public transit. College Station just doesn't quite offer the same variety of individuals as the streets of Buenos Aires. 
• Walking everywhere. Thirty blocks in a day is nothing, and, I'm quite fond of walking...
• Being a novelty. In America if I roll out of bed and stumble to the grocery store looking a hot mess, no men on the street yell after me "belleza de oro!" (golden beauty) just because of my hair. :[ Self-confidence is gonna plummet, I tell ya
• Curly-headed blonde blue-eyed Spanish-speaking babies in smocks. There is nothing better. Nothing.
• People who don't speak English. It's just so much more endearing, and more challenging. They're a bit harder to come by in the States.
• Tea parties. Every time you order tea (which is nearly daily for me), it usually comes in a baby teapot with your own treats and entirely to many tiny dishes.
• Kissing on the cheek. Not gonna lie, it took some getting used to. But now, I have to remind myself that it's not normal in the US to kiss every (yes EVERY) person in the room on the cheek when you walk in. All Americans do is shake hands or wave at new acquaintances.. that seems so cold! 
• Argentine boys. Full disclosure: I fall in love just about every time I leave my house. And they all have names like Alejandro, Julián, Felipe, Sebastián, Beto, Emiliano,  Santiago. It's like straight out of a Mary Kate & Ashley movie, y mi corazón derrite diariamente...
• Cool looking keys. Old elevators. Balconies with a view.
• Pretty architecture. Pretty dogs. Pretty people.
• The weather. I’m not going to enjoy jumping straight into 100 degree summer days… not when I’ve been chillin’ here in sweater weather land. (Cue The Neighbourhood).

Things I Will Not Miss:

• Calculating my net worth every time I leave the house. “Okay this watch plus my laptop plus my smartphone plus whatever cash I have oh and my aggie ring which means if I got mugged I’d be out…”
• The constant feeling of mild confusion. It’s going to be a strange and wonderful sensation to be in a place where I have a decent idea of what’s going on 95% of the time.
• Uneven sidewalks and dog poop everywhere.
• Drat-tails and drullets. You didn't think rat-tails or mullets could get much worse, did you? That's because the "Let's dread-lock them!" idea hasn't hit the US yet. THANK GOODNESS. 
• Inconvenience of city life. Adding on an hour anywhere you go is a necessity. Because what if the subte isn’t running? What if there’s a protest and traffic isn’t moving? What if the bus drivers are on strike?
• The nightlife schedule. Here, I will leave the house after 1am for a night out. Here, I answer the question “Did you stay out all night?” with “No, I got back around 6am.” Here, when I leave a party at 4:30 I am the first one to head home. It’s exhausting and really messes up a sleep schedule.
• Inefficiency. Yeah one waitress seems enough for these fifteen tables. Yeah two bartenders should do the trick for this group of two-hundred. No, no need for lines. No no, no rush. 

Things I Will Welcome with Open Arms:

• Bella. I love that Bean and have been needing some quality Bean-time for approximately 4.5 months now.
• Beverly. When you have a car you don't have to wait for a bus or anything you can just drive STRAIGHT THERE. 
• Piano. Sometimes I wonder if I can actually still read music… that piano and I are going to have a lot of quality time together when I get back. Some Rachmaninoff, a bit of Chopin, and then banging the keys and singing Spanish ballads at the top of my lungs till mom yells at me to stop.
• Free water. You guys, if you haven’t stopped to thank our Founding Fathers that water is free and not-gross in the US, please do so at this moment.
• Salads, sweet tea, food with flavor, margaritas, waffles.
• Bed. My own bed with its huge fluffy down comforter. 
• The ability to hang out with friends at my own house. (We’re not supposed to have guests over to our host-families houses, which means a lot of time in cafés, and hangouts on the roof)
• Dr Pepper Cowboys from Fuego. Biggest craving since I've been here!
• Credit cards. I have all but completely lost the concept that in America you can use your debit card if you don’t have cash and it is the same thing
• Culture norms that I understand. Cultural barriers are not a joke, people. I learned early-on to pass most situations through Claudia, my Colombian-American friend, who serves as our cultural-interpretor. I'm finally getting the hang of it, and have learned the differences in Colombians and Argentines, and in Porteños and ones from provincia. It's been a struggle though and I am looking forward to being in a country where we all speak the same (unspoken) language.
• 3G. If you're lost you just pull out your phone and look up directions, you don't have to carry a map or look up buses in advance or anything! If you're wondering something--anything!--you can look it up right then and there! And most importantly, you can snapchat and vine from anywhere!
• A kitchen. Where I can bake cookies and pies and stuff.
• Efficiency. Order. Organization. 
• Most of all, my sweet family and all my wonderful friends. It's been one heck of an adventure but I am at a hug deficit and am looking to rectify that as soon as possible. :)

I would say that I've had the time of my life here, but I hope that's not true. I hope that this is just one of many adventures I'll experience in my life. I've gotten a taste of the world, a taste of adventure, and I'm afraid now I will not be able to stop.

I won't say goodbye, only "until next time." 

I'm leaving a piece of my heart here, and I'll be back for it one day.

Hasta luego, entonces, Buenos Aires!